Hell of a Guy

My World…


My dad’s words are ringing in my ears.  I heard Dad say many times how in retirement he had so much to do he didn’t know how he ever found time to go to work.  I thought he was nuts.  The first couple of months into mine I thought I would go crazy with boredom: my, how things change.  I think retirement may kill me.

Using yesterday as an example of my world these days, I was super busy.  I awoke yesterday at 3:55 and refused to get out of bed until 5, so I laid there making a half-hearted attempt to go back to sleep as my rapidly atrophying medulla oblongata made a list of projects that included working in my garden to harvest some onions and garlic and prepare a plot for some collard greens and kale.  Then I drug out The Tank (my zero-turn mower) and cut the trails through the fields of the farm.  We have company coming the weekend and our company loves to drive the Wrangler we own over them. 

I then began to get the front porch ready for our guests.  Farm living is nice, but there are things about living on one city folk don’t have to deal with – one being dust.  This gravel driveway, especially in dry period, throws up a lot of dust when driven over, and that dust, for some reason, loves to adhere to the siding on the front porch.  The rest of the house gets hit with rain and most of the dust washes off, but not the porch, so I spent about two hours washing down the walls by hand.  I couldn’t use a hose because the water would seep through the floor boards into the basement.  It made my back ache and my muscles sore.

My lunch break lasted about fifteen minutes.  While in the house I baked two loaves of zucchini bread – we have about 40 pounds of zucchini in the fridges (one up, two down).  I have used it every way I can think of and still have zillions of them leftover.  There are now ten loaves in the freezer.  They kind of look like adobe bricks.  Now if I could only think of a use for them?  Hmmm! 

I moved next to cleaning up some fallen branches from the violent storm we had two weeks ago, it made my back ache even more.  The branches are everywhere.  I could spend a whole day just on them…and probably will later.  There is still a large tree on the ground, as well.  I am not sure when I will get it all cleaned up, or, because it is so big at the trunk, if I can.  I loaded the branches and leaf clutter onto and into my Jeep and made a couple of trips dumping it up in the woods near the house.

When I got all these chores done I had to vacuum Wrangler, and I mean vacuum.  It took me about 30 minutes to get leaves, tree bark and twigs out of it.  All that crap filled up the reservoir of the vac, so I got to empty it, and with that I ended my day.

I caught a glimpse of my reflection in a window.  It was ugly.  Sweaty and covered in dust and dirt from head to toe.  I wore a hat to keep the sun from cooking my ever growing forehead that now begins just above my eyebrows and extends over the crown of my head and down the backside of it.  My hair, or what is left it, made me looked more deranged than I usually appear.  I made my way to the shower in the basement and it felt so good, kind of rejuvenating.

This house and this property are a lot of work.  The Nancy asked me last night, as I occasionally grunted and sighed as I moved my aching body to find a comfortable position, if I was ready to move to a smaller house.  Well, I cannot say I am ready now, but a few more days like yesterday, and it appears today’s to-do list is just as long, I may begin to think about it.  For now I am quite satisfied to see how much I can abuse this aging body.

And that is all I have to say about that… 

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