The Man I have Become

03/03/2006

If you do not wish to know of this, now would be a good time to go to another site.  Meredith, turn away now.

A mere fifteen months ago I began a series of workshops in Dallas, Texas that changed my life.  I cannot say I was forced to do this, but the challenge was laid before me in so many ways by the woman with whom I share my life.  Nancy had completed the series of three prior to my going to the Basic workshop at Millennium3 Education in November of 2004.  (I will share the website just once - http://www.millennium3education.com.) As the Basic workshop got started, and a mere three hours into it, I was hooked.  Doors I had closed years before suddenly opened, as did my eyes.  The realization of the fraudulent manner in which I had lived the first sixty years of my life hit me like nothing ever had before.  Throughout the Advanced workshop and the ninety-plus days of the Leadership Program, I got to examine what I was, who I was, take control of my life and ditch the facade I had worn since birth.  This is without a doubt the greatest thing I have ever done for me. 

Without spilling the beans on exactly what the program is and how it works, I will tell you of one thing I got to do that has had the most positive affect on me.  I got to establish a contract for life with myself.  I am a Courageous, Open and Connected Man.  Now you may wonder what this means?  Here it is in a nutshell: I now stand up and face life headon, where before I did not; I am now very vulneralbe, where before I was not open to anyone or anything, even hiding from myself; I am connected, simply meaning I am in touch and I care, whereas before Millennium I was not.  Am I perfect?  Not by a long shot; however, the changes in my way of being are measurable and very sustainable. 

Each of us posesses a public persona and a private persona.  That is to say, who you are in public - the person you truly wish everyone to think you are - is not necessarily the person you face in the mirror each morning.  In my morning person I saw someone hugely different than the David I wanted the world to believe was me.  Millennium allowed me to examine myself openly and honestly, and to take the steps to be the man my God intended me to be.

During this past year I have taken a special interest in letting those people I love know it.  Having come to realize there are people in my life that I truly love that includes close and extended family, friends and co-workers, I took the risk, though it wasn’t much of one, and have begun to let them know how I truly feel about them.  And, guess what happened?  The responses I received were overwhelmingly positive, and my “I love you” was acknowledged and returned.  Amazing?  Not really. It is they way it is supposed to be. 

3-7-06...When I wrote this I did not intend for it to go to the site.  Actually, I had not completed it and wanted to mull it over for a while, to ruminate on what I had said.  So much for rumination.  I must have mistakenly hit the submit button.  In any event, it is posted and will stay for a few days.  My intent is purely to let all know that I see changes, huge changes, in my way of being since completing this program.  I have developed a love of life, of people, of things, and especially a love of me that I did not have.  People ask me how I am, and now I tell them I am perfect.  That is how I feel.  I am a Courageous, Open and Connected Man, and I am damn glad to know you.