Hell of a Guy
Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one. - Albert Einstein

Friday, March 22, 2013

Let’s Get Physical, Physical…

03/22/2013

A few years ago I pledged to begin a program to maintain a higher level of health.  Part of that program is a yearly physical and a daily exercise program I attempt to maintain.  The physical part is a snap.  I just call the doctor’s office and make the appointment.  Once there, the doctor does the rest.  The exercise part is all up to me and a tad harder to maintain, but I manage to exercise an average five and a half days a week…I think.

My exercise program these days take me about an hour and fifteen minutes and includes treadmill, some free weights and some calisthenics.  According to the treadmill I burn about 600 to 700 calories, which is about the same amount in three beers, making the exercise calorie burn and the beer calorie intake a washout.  Perfect!

The physical thingy is a little different.  I am not a modest guy, generally speaking, but it is a little disconcerting to be standing buck naked in front of another man who is checking your private parts asking you to turn your head and cough.  It is even more disconcerting when the doctor asks you to bend over and grab your ankles – most unpleasant.

I made it through all the nastiness of the physical with a determined smile on my face, but one part of it did make me laugh.  I was lying on my back on the examination table which other than a stool the doctor sat on and one very uncomfortable chair was the only furniture in the room.  The doctor was pushing on, prodding and squeezing my abdomen, my arms and my legs.  He squeezed my ankles and was looking closely at my feet.It surprised me when he told me the condition of a person feet, especially the toenails, were an indication of that person’s overall health.  Sounded weird to me, but he’s the doc and I am just a gullible patient.  And then he said something even weirder: He said I still had hair growing on my toes and that it is even a better indicator of my overall health.  Hair on my toes is an indication of my level of overall health?  Whatever!  I felt like Bilbo Baggins, except as a six-footer I don’t quite look the part and I generally wear shoes.

I walked away from this year’s physical feeling pretty good about myself.  Yeah, I have some aches and pains, mostly as a consequence of aging, I think, but all-in-all nothing I can’t put up with.  I find myself slowing down a little…maybe I should say it takes me a little longer to get things done, but I can deal with that, too.

Hopefully, I will be around for the completion of another orbit of the sun and another physical in 2014, and maybe for the next one I have my toes painted and ribbons in the hair on my toes.

And that is all I have to say about that…