Hell of a Guy
Freedom of Press is limited to those who own one - H.L. Mencken

Friday, November 23, 2012

Thanksgiving, Circa 2012…


Put another one in the can, almost literally.  The meal was cooked, served, consumed, and ruminated over and under.  The people were fed, stuffed, miserable, but happy.  A good time was had by all.

This year as last, The Nancy and I packed up our part of the Thanksgiving Feast and carted it 150 miles west to her mom’s house.  This year as last, each of the attending families was assigned certain dishes to bring.  Our short list included turkey, plain dressing, potato rolls, a minced meat pie, Brussels sprouts, gravy, carrots, and special orders from The Nancy’s mom to bring her some Pretzel Bark (white chocolate, dry-roasted peanuts, pretzel sticks).  Others were to bring desserts (pumpkin pie, cheese cake, cake balls and fudge), mashed potatoes, green beans, sweet potato casserole and some oyster dressing.  Some us went a tad beyond the assignment we were given.  I know we should not have done it, but in addition to our assigned dishes we brought some extra stuff, a squash casserole and a chocolate pie.  We should have stuck to the plan. 

This year as last, I prepared two 20lb turkeys.  I estimated we had at least thirty pounds of meat sliced off the birds’ carcasses.  I ain’t no math whiz, but that works out to a little over a pound each, especially when considering I do not eat fowl meat (last consumed prior to 8-11-1996).  Typical of my dear wife’s mother, 30lbs was deemed not be enough and another sixteen pounder was made.  Originally we planned for up to thirty souls for this meal, but as with most family get-togethers we lost some guests along the way for various reasons.  So as you might have guessed, we had way too much food for the twenty of us that actually sat down for the meal.  Continuing with our mathematics lesson, the pre-cooking weight of these three birds was 56, you with me, yes, that is “56” pounds of turkey.  We could have fed Patton’s army.

As if that wasn’t enough, The Nancy’s brother Chuck, who was assigned the oyster dressing that only he and his father eat, made not only it but also more plain dressing and some concoction made with rye bread and at least 10lbs of each one, altogether with what we brought we had about 35lbs of dressing to go along with the zillion pounds of turkey and 20lbs of side dishes and desserts.  Needless to say there was an abundance of leftovers when the meal was done.  We spent the rest of the evening periodically complaining of how miserably full we were.  After all, that is the sport of Thanksgiving.

This was a family day for us, as it probably was for you.  Whether your group was large or small, I sincerely hope your day was as happy as mine.  I think I can say without equivocation this was The Best Thanksgiving Ever! 

Now some eighteen hours since my last meal I can sense some rumblings in my stomach and the call to “feed me.”  I will oblige the call for sustenance when and if I can coax The Nancy from her slumber…and that may prove difficult.

And that is all I have to say about that…